Coulda, Shoulda, Woulda…
by Jugghead

It's the first year of college, and I'm losing my mind,
Girls from all over the world, and almost all of them fine.
And I'm never concentrating in class, I'd rather think about
Several honies shaking datazz at a party I was at,
But at my dorm there was even more hotness,
To a brotha from the hood, all of them were exotic.
There was this Arab Chic. She had some gifts!
She graduated, and I think she's now an activist.
There was another beauty from the nation of Ghana,
I thought she was the bomb, but some other dude got her.
I met a dime from the Bahamas, even one from Tibet.
But there's one lady in particular I'll never forget.
Rich girl from Grosse Pointe. Indian or Pakistani
Ex-model type, for which you keep a credit card handy,
Eye candy. Made me thank God for Co-ed dorms.
Seeing her in tight pajamas, such a treat in the morn.
Saw a picture where it's like she couldn't find a tighter dress.
She had a sister just as pretty as her – but I digress.
And back home I had a squaw, but I was trifling as heck.
Every pretty girl I saw, I wanted right in my bed.
Including – ooh! Naming names is not something that I wanna do.
If you're a pretty girl, and I hung out with you? I wanted you.
But this Indian Chick was pick of the list,
But she wasn't snobby, acting like I didn't exist.
She was very personable, though she talked a little bit, it
Seemed like she'd blab her business to anyone willing to listen.
She even told me what she liked to do in the sheets,
But I was mad, because she never thought to do it to me.
And before you try to judge, keep in mind I was a freshman.
I was immature as heck, and open to all suggestions.
But she was still fine, and I loved being near her.
But things between us never got clearer. She wanted me to
Hook her up with this dude I knew from the track team,
But he wanted another girl, so it was like a bad dream.
When the one you're chasing is chasing somebody else,
Who is chasing somebody else. None of this would end well.
In fact, we fell out over that, but I was wrong,
'cause I wanted her, but had a girl at home all along.
Years pass, now I'm in my 4th year at the school,
And I'm single, 'cause I set my girl free, like a fool.
I thought I could upgrade to a better tenderoni,
And eventually I did, but that's a whole different story.
I'm in the cafeteria at some dormitory,
Trying to get a quick bite before I head to class,
When I saw that same chick come and get her food last,
And sit off by herself, looking like somebody just passed.
Yeah, We broke off on a sour note, but what the hell, bygones.
I went up to her table and I played the role of nice Quan.
Hey, it's been a while, kid, how do you do?
I saw you looking kinda down, what's bothering you?
She let me take a seat in front of her, I listened while she went off
About some stuff that's on her mind, and I just let her vent off.
She made the honor roll, but changed majors, ain't no stopping that.
She had some problem with an internship, and on top of that,
She was the RA at her dorm, but she felt really bad, cause
She partied every night and was setting a bad example.
That's not something I advocate, but who was I to judge her?
She's still God's child, so I was commanded to love her.
I said it's not the end of the world, do better next time.
She must have needed advice, because she did accept mine.
She thanked me as we left, but to me it's nothing major,
Everyone needs someone to be there for them sooner or later.
The next time I saw her was a few months after.
I'm walking to my dorm when I saw her waiting at the
bus stop. Now, here’s a fact provided for you,
the campus of my alma mater is divided in two.
The music, art and engineering schools are on the north side, where I reside,
But ladygirl lived on the central side
And never came up north, except for this one occasion,
She saw some singer at the music school, now she was waiting
For the bus out in the cold, she was shivering and wheezing.
It was cold and wet outside, and I could tell that she was freezing.
I said, hey, why dontcha catch the bus from my dorm?
It's right down the street and you can wait up there where it's warm.
She was with it, but she had never been to my spot.
So she asked me for a guided tour, I said why not.
I showed her all the different rooms on all of the floors,
The cafeteria computer labs and so much more.
Then we waited for the bus to come, it wouldn't be soon.
While we were waiting, she asked if I could show her my room – yeah.
This was, like, the single college boy's fantasy.
But then she squashed it all by telling me she had a man, and she
Was satisfied with him, but then I suddenly began to see,
That if she's so content with him, then why's she trying to hang with me?
So we go up to my room and started talking…
Well, she did all the talking. She was going on and on, and
It seemed to me like everything she talked about was sex related,
But maybe I was thinking like a hammer trying to nail it.
While she talked, she kept rubbing her neck.
I asked if I could rub it down, 'cause I could tell she was tense.
And I happen to specialize in back rubs and neck massage.
I learned to do it, 'cause I heard of all the sex it caused.
Though it didn't really work, at least until now.
But she didn't have a problem with me rubbing her down.
Now, One hand's on the back of her neck. The other hand's
On the small of her back. I felt her loosening up.
So I keep rubbing, and I'm thinking if I do this enough,
Then maybe I could put her in the mood for doing some stuff.
If I move a little lower and massage a little slower,
I could take her to some places that she's never been befower.
'Cause I knew that if she'd only let me do her,
We would write some brand new chapters in that old Kama Sutra.
See, I was still a virgin…don't smile.
'Cause I was trying to give virginity away, with some style.
And I could've been wrong, could have been all in my mind,
But she seemed to be giving me back the same vibe.
Have you ever wanted something so bad you had to have it, then
Got a chance at it, but would be wrong to take advantage?
There was a time I would've jumped at it, and jumped on it,
Just because I could have it, and all I had to do was want it.
But I wasn't like that anymore.
Taking another man's girlfriend would've made me a whore.
Also, what if I was wrong, and she rejected my advances?
(plus I didn't have no condoms, and I wasn't taking chances.)
So I took my hands off her, and we just talked until dawn.
She missed her bus, so I ended up walking her home.
When she walked through the door, she looked back at me strange,
As if she also realized just how close we came
To doing something that we soon would regret, well, maybe she would.
I'd have probably felt great, so that not happening was real good.
but I still believe I could've had her if I asked,
and I wanted to ask, because I wanted her bad.
But what kind of man would I have been to take advantage,
And be the reason why her relationship was damaged?
I think a higher power kept me from doing that badness,
'cause since then, the only sex I've had was in my marriage.
Which makes the choice I made back then even more valid.
Who knows what would have happened if I got married with that baggage?
And as for ladygirl? Well, she's doing just fine.
She's out in the middle east, now, and she still is a dime.
Dunno if she's still with him, but now it's none of my business,
This story's finished, and it's time for me to stop reminiscing.